AMFM Conference-Workshops Day 3
On Day 3 (Thursday), the final day of AMFM, I was again able to attend 3 workshops. They were: Engaging the Church in Caring for Divorcees & Single Parent Families, Desire in Marriage, and Creating Events that Matter for Married Couples.
Engaging the Church in Caring For Divorcees & Single Parent Families-The first workshop was very thought provoking regarding the church's view of divorced people. The presenter was Wes Butler. He started by sharing from several Scriptures: Genesis 16:13, John 4:29-30, Matthew 19:8, Psalm 68:5, James 1:27. He posed the question: Are single parents present-day widows & orphans?
How should the church engage? He shared several thoughts. First, we must allow the broken & hurting in. See Proverbs 14:4. We must also be willing to get our hands and feet dirty. He stresses this is not just programs, but walking with people through difficult processes. We need to be incarnational-how can we help with finances, meals, other needs?He reminded us to focus on the right battle during crisis: are we focused on the legal or spiritual? God's very best and our desire should be reconciliation. He shared a few encouraging stories that he had seen in his ministry about reconciliation.
Another key point he made was about our communication. What do our current ministries say (passively or actively) to a separated or divorced person? It is important they know that the church will care for you and your family. He highly recommended Divorce Care for churches to use. It is important to try and use those who have been there 2 Corinthians talks about those who have been comforted will in turn comfort others. We must share the gospel all the time in this ministry. A favorite quote of his was "willing, walking, and warm does not make a warrior." We closed our time with questions and answers.
Desire in Marriage-This workshop was led by Dr. Michael Sytsma. He shared from an hour of a passionate intimacy workshop he does in churches. He challenged us to define desire & want? He stressed that problems related to sexual desire are common, painful, and complex. He shared from studies that have asked the question: what is normal desire? The results are inconclusive and he stated the professionals cannot even answer the question so a better question is communication within a relationship rather than what is "normal." He shared several slides about a research project he completed in this area. He closed by sharing about barriers to sexual desire. They are body issues, not working on the marriage, not disciplining our sexuality, not keeping the marital bed sacred, past trauma, poor sexual scripts/beliefs, & pressure (tends to shut down desire). We ended with questions and answers and a few resources were shared which were The Way to Love Your Wife by Penner & Celebration of Sex by Roseaneau.
Creating Events for Married Couples that Matter-This workshop was led by Ted Lowe. He shared that from experience it is important to have a one night event rather than a weekend. He walked through ten steps to create events. They were: events for married couples matter, market and program to cherish women, respect men, and empower both, determine your target audience, determine your big-picture content, determine the bottom line, craft the message, program the event, schedule the events, promote the event, and execute the event.
Here are a few other key things he shared. For marriage events, it must be safe for the husband. If you can't do it with excellence, don't do it. Don't over advertise the church during the event. They have found to have the event on a Saturday or Sunday instead of a Friday. For more resources, check out www.marriedpeople.org.
Engaging the Church in Caring For Divorcees & Single Parent Families-The first workshop was very thought provoking regarding the church's view of divorced people. The presenter was Wes Butler. He started by sharing from several Scriptures: Genesis 16:13, John 4:29-30, Matthew 19:8, Psalm 68:5, James 1:27. He posed the question: Are single parents present-day widows & orphans?
How should the church engage? He shared several thoughts. First, we must allow the broken & hurting in. See Proverbs 14:4. We must also be willing to get our hands and feet dirty. He stresses this is not just programs, but walking with people through difficult processes. We need to be incarnational-how can we help with finances, meals, other needs?He reminded us to focus on the right battle during crisis: are we focused on the legal or spiritual? God's very best and our desire should be reconciliation. He shared a few encouraging stories that he had seen in his ministry about reconciliation.
Another key point he made was about our communication. What do our current ministries say (passively or actively) to a separated or divorced person? It is important they know that the church will care for you and your family. He highly recommended Divorce Care for churches to use. It is important to try and use those who have been there 2 Corinthians talks about those who have been comforted will in turn comfort others. We must share the gospel all the time in this ministry. A favorite quote of his was "willing, walking, and warm does not make a warrior." We closed our time with questions and answers.
Desire in Marriage-This workshop was led by Dr. Michael Sytsma. He shared from an hour of a passionate intimacy workshop he does in churches. He challenged us to define desire & want? He stressed that problems related to sexual desire are common, painful, and complex. He shared from studies that have asked the question: what is normal desire? The results are inconclusive and he stated the professionals cannot even answer the question so a better question is communication within a relationship rather than what is "normal." He shared several slides about a research project he completed in this area. He closed by sharing about barriers to sexual desire. They are body issues, not working on the marriage, not disciplining our sexuality, not keeping the marital bed sacred, past trauma, poor sexual scripts/beliefs, & pressure (tends to shut down desire). We ended with questions and answers and a few resources were shared which were The Way to Love Your Wife by Penner & Celebration of Sex by Roseaneau.
Creating Events for Married Couples that Matter-This workshop was led by Ted Lowe. He shared that from experience it is important to have a one night event rather than a weekend. He walked through ten steps to create events. They were: events for married couples matter, market and program to cherish women, respect men, and empower both, determine your target audience, determine your big-picture content, determine the bottom line, craft the message, program the event, schedule the events, promote the event, and execute the event.
Here are a few other key things he shared. For marriage events, it must be safe for the husband. If you can't do it with excellence, don't do it. Don't over advertise the church during the event. They have found to have the event on a Saturday or Sunday instead of a Friday. For more resources, check out www.marriedpeople.org.
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